You Owe It To Yourself To Overcome Depression and Anxiety. Favorite Mistake.

Looking back at my life being depressed, always having the belief that I would fail in most social happenings, I feel sad. I feel sad for all the missed opportunities that were there. The girls who were probably interested (atleast open to the idea of wanting to get to know me better), and either I never even talked to them or if I did, I messed it up with silent awkwardness.

Some were even very obviously flirting with me but I had such a defeatist attitude that it went right over my head. Or I would have so much self doubt that it would turn into a self-fulfilling prophesy.


I have missed opportunities that will never come again, but luckily I finally fixed it from now onwards. I'm not dying anytime soon and the world is my oyster.

Things are still not 100% perfect. At a job meeting, my heart will sometimes noticibly beat harder and faster when I am about to talk. But I go with it anyway. I notice that if I don't talk much in public for awhile I get a bit rusty. Life is an accumulation of habits.

It reminds me of what someone who is really talkative told me as advice when he saw how quiet I was: talk louder, just say something. It doesn't matter if it is wrong, no one really cares.

Having SA makes a person have a bad habit of being very negative. It's borderline delusional to think that everyone is quietly judging you. Honestly, 5 seconds later, even if you make a mistake, most people won't even remember it. Even if you said something quite wrong/awkward, if you are better next time, they won't even remember the first mistake at all. Honestly, people don't think about you as much as you think they do. Their lives are busy and are not focused on yours.

Anyway I was thinking about how genes are related to personality. I wonder how much genes and dna are related to a person with anxiety?